Nothing fancy, just “stuff”

I am sitting here, on the eve of my second Refuge Recovery meeting, looking at some stuff, educating myself and furthering my knowledge of the Refuge. I have met some amazing people along the way, including one of the co-founders of Refuge. He has been extremely supportive of my journey and for that I thank you. I have also met a lot of people that facilitate meetings in other areas of the U.S. and Canada and am amazed at their following. They have given me a lot of tips and tricks to the program, and for that I am forever thankful.

When I started RRKZOO I had a vision. While I have only had one meeting so far, I am hopeful that it will take off as this is, in my opinion, exactly what “everyone else” has been looking for. By that, I mean those that are turned off by traditional 12-step programs. I don’t expect it to blow up like it has in New York, California, Washington etc. but I do hope that our little community here in the area learns some things from it. I actually led the meeting on Monday and felt very well prepared and ready for everything. I let my spirit be my guide. Tomorrow is a new day for me. I start a new job, a second RR meeting, but something that I realized about today.

I went to my home group meeting and it seemed that everyone kind of….I don’t know….acted a bit….differently perhaps? I know that I am that “Buddah” guy in my home group, but I used to think everyone was okay with that. It didn’t bother me however, as I know where I am in my program, in my recovery, in my life. Very little do we learn from others when we judge them, but there is a lesson in ourselves. When we do judge others, it is a direct reflection of our opinion. It is our personal criticism of them that make us feel better or worse about ourselves. While this is not the way it should be, it happens and we often do it unknowingly.

I work very hard at this to not judge others. I have been well known for it in the past, and I attempt to refrain from it now. Tomorrow I will be a better person, because I need to be. I will be kind to others, accepting and offer my gratitude and happiness to them. While I dread starting a new job, like many others do, I am looking forward to some stability in my life. It has been a shitstorm since May, and it is time to turn that around.

Namaste